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You could do so much in 14 days. Reach out to your family. Start writing your novel. Learn to dance. Go through a full COVID-19 quarantine.

Or you could spend the time doing something useful, like developing an acute knowledge of bread-based foods in Shanghai, by ordering a different sandwich every day for fourteen days. I'm not saying that's what I did. I'm a professional. I did it in two days. Here are my recommendations.

I will not be taking questions at this time.

. (.) . .

1. New York Reuben

Available On: ele.me, Sherpa's, Meituan Waimai - 68rmb

Bagelwiches are sandwiches, and SPB bagels are top-notch, wonderful things. I particularly enjoy the whole wheat Reuben. The cured beef brisket isn't as tasty as Tock's smoked special meat, but it's nearly as meaty. The Emmenthal, sauerkraut and Russian dressing is just a subtle leitmotif in the meat symphony.

2. Smoked Beef Sandwich

Available On: ele.me, Sherpa's, Meituan Waimai - 78rmb

"Why not the Reuben," you ask? Need to maximize your smoked beef. They even put the top slice perpendicular so that you can keep the red meat from escaping out the back. Like little wings. It comes with fries, which is superfluous. Tock's Montreal deli beef needs nothing except a little mustard.

3. Chicken & Pork Banh Mi

Available On: ele.me, Sherpa's, Meituan Waimai - 58rmb

We're not short on banh mi in the city: see , and . I could go for any of them but Saigon Mama's banh mi has a lot of pickled carrot and I like pickled carrot. The grilled chicken also good (55rmb).

4. Santa Barbara

Available On: ele.me, Meituan Waimai - 58rmb

See Rule 1. This is a double-cheeseburger sandwich on buttered toast with avocado. It straddles the categories like an Olympic gymnast and triple-flips its way to gold. Best ordered with a malted vanilla milkshake.

5. Cochinita Burrito

Available On: ele.me, Sherpa's, Meituan Waimai - 50rmb

Mexican sandwiches exist but not in Shanghai. This is the closest we get, and it's a wrap, so Rule 4 applies. Plenty of these available in the city. . . . La Coyota's Cocinita Burrito stands out a as a delivery option because it isn't likely to fall apart in your hands and get rice and pulled pork in your keyboard. Plus it's pretty damn cheap. Crucial in a good burrito.

6. Great Balls of Fire Meatball Sub

Available On: Sherpa's, Meituan Waimai - 88rmb

All of Austin Hu's sandwiches are daylight-destroying nuclear submarines, but this one especially. Back when it was on , I'd go for lunch and the energy required to digest this monster meatball distribution system would annihilate my afternoon. Nothing got done after 2pm on a Madison Kitchen day. Now it can be delivered to my desk. Oh. Oh good.

7. Buffalo Fried Chicken

Available On: ele.me - 68rmb

Bird's pitching to the gourmands with their new sandwich menu. Honorable mention to the vegetarian Bombay Club for trying to getting something ethical in me but I prefer the Buffalo Fried Chicken. Pleasantly spicy, pleasantly Gorgonzolan. Comes with a side of pickled stuff.

8. Parma Ham

Available On: ele.me - 78rmb

Sheets of parma ham! Waves of it! Bite a hole in the middle and you've got a rain poncho. Totino Panino has really upped the ante on Italian sandwiches in Shanghai. Their bedrock is solid sandwiches on fresh ciabatta with cold cuts. Now available on delivery. Forza Italia.

9. Choripan Sandwich

Available On: ele.me - 60rmb

Comes in a baguette, see Rule 3. It tastes like South American carnival food. A chorizo stuffed with chimichurri. Of course it's good.

10. Polux Double Decker Club Sandwich

Available On: ele.me - 110rmb

Mr. & Mrs. Bund are new to delivery (thanks global epidemic!), which means we don't have to put pants on to eat there anymore. This is a very Paul Pairet sandwich: smoky, salty and intense. Perfect for the upcoming Paul Pairet Country Club and Polux Horse Stables in Jinqiao. (Jokes. Or...) But "doubledecker"? Where's the second deck? Am I supposed to stack the wedges myself? How do I earn my second deck?

11. Filet o' Fish

Available On: , ele.me, Meituan Waimai - 21.5rmb

This one's divisive. Schismatic. The Martin Luther of sandwiches (no meat patty, see Rule 2). Is it disgusting or is it the greatest thing to happen to seafood since fishing with dynamite?

12. Country Ham

Available On: Sherpa's - 65rmb

I want to take it home and introduce it to my parents so bad. God.

Everything on the menu at Co. Cheese is worth having. All of it. I picked the Country Ham because it looks the sandwich-y-est. The only downside to delivery is that you don't get to drown it in their hot sauce.

13. Classic Pork Katsu

Available On: Sherpa's - 59rmb

This is fluffy, sweet white bread with the crust cut off like gran-gran used to do. Nice grainy mustard and cabbage with a crunchy fried pork cutlet.

14. Falafel Wrap

Available On: ele.me, Sherpa's, Meituan Waimai - 40rmb

Wrap. Sandwich. WHICH ONE IS IT. Look, we needed a vegetarian one and this ambiguous Lebanese tube fit the bill.

To Celebrate: Ice Cream Sandwich

Available On: :(

We were going to say that you could celebrate your first day with a by getting one of these puppies, but the ice cream sandwich is not available during the Special Period due to supply chain disruptions. #fuckcoronavirus. Go to FamilyMart instead and get a Snickers ice cream. They're new.