There鈥檚 never been a better time to go. It won鈥檛 be this way for long. You鈥檝e been warned.
Yangon
Most people will tell you to spend only a day or two in Yangon. I agree. My recommendation: pick any spot in the city and walk there with a bad map (or no map). We chose Shwedagon Pagoda, because why not? It鈥檚 huge and gold.
The streets of Yangon are wonderful鈥攁 compelling mix of crumbling colonial architecture and poorly made buildings built by and for a poor country. But there鈥檚 a hustle and bustle to the streets that I dig.
Yangon also has an innovative analog solution to the electronic doorbell. Businesses above the first floor drape long cords down to the street from their balconies, connected to little bells above. Here鈥檚 a fourth floor dental clinic soliciting patients:
Approaching Shwedagon, you see the telltale signs of a meaningful-place-turned-hollow-tourist-attraction. At the mouth of a park across from the temple, two men on stilts鈥攐ne in blackface鈥攄ance to the Macarena. Just within the park grounds is the dirtiest man-made 鈥渓ake鈥� I鈥檝e ever seen. Tchotchkes abound.
Far above the street, the golden dome of Shwedagon looms. To get there, you have to hike up hundreds of stairs, past dozens of stalls selling lousy factory-produced Buddha miniatures, cheesy t-shirts, packs of cheap incense, coffee mugs. But press on you will; it鈥檚 why you came, after all.
At the top of the stairs, you pay USD 8 (about 48rmb) to get in plus an additional five bucks for a longyi if you鈥檙e in shorts or a garment that reveals your legs. At the time, this irked me鈥攚hat, they鈥檙e going to pretend that somewhere amidst all of this crass commercialism there鈥檚 a spiritual center?
But my longyi鈥攁 sort of skirt that dudes and ladies alike wear in Burma鈥攃hanged my life. Ladies, you鈥檙e onto something with skirts.
The surrounding shrines and temples are wonderful, and better restored. When we visited, the main attraction was strapped with scaffolding (and, we learned from an informal guide, almost entirely restored with little to nothing remaining of the original) and offered little.
But there is some nice stuff up at the top of Shwedagon, like this:
Bagan
I won鈥檛 try and be flowery here: Bagan is the most incredible place I鈥檝e ever been. There are thousands of temples, more or less untouched, free and open for exploration.
Despite a few main temples that get crowded at sunrise and sunset, there are thousands of others that aren鈥檛, and there is no shortage of places to discover the area almost entirely alone. The big, popular temples are worth taking in during the day, but at sunrise and sunset wise travelers will find that random, unmarked sites with stairways to the upper reaches will do just fine.
You鈥檒l want at least two full days in Bagan, and the first move is renting some cheap electric scooters. At USD 8 bucks (about 48rmb) a day, these things are a steal. Just ask any hotel or guesthouse and they鈥檒l hook you up, with delivery and drop off at the lobby for your convenience.
Best of all, it鈥檚 a no-holds-barred all-you-can-scooter situation. If you get a flat (which we did, 11 times), or run down your battery (which we also did, seven times), or lose your bike entirely (which we actually did, no kidding), it鈥檚 not a problem. You find the nearest person with a cellphone, show them the card on your key and they鈥檒l call the rental place, who sends someone out with a fresh bike in around 15 minutes.
These bikes give you the freedom you need to wander the thousands of temples aimlessly. If you visit Bagan in the winter, a regular bike will suffice 鈥� but when it鈥檚 hot, the importance of these electric scooters can鈥檛 be overstated.
And the temples, man. Just, man. Wow. They look pretty damn good at sunrise:
Spend your sunrises at North Guni, an as-yet-undiscovered gem of a temple that you can climb鈥攆or now, at least. Burmese tourism officials have already closed some temples off with gates for preservation and safety purposes, and the amount of freely available temples is sure to drop dramatically in the next few years. On one occasion, one of my friends was climbing a temple and an entire cornice came off in his hand. He was lucky not to fall, and the temple鈥檚 inevitable demise was hastened. Such freedom is, unfortunately, bad for everyone.
Avoid at all costs the popular temples anytime the sun is near the horizon. Here is North Guni at sunrise:
Here are some more temples during the day:
When you get your fill of temples, head west towards the Ayeyarwaddy River, which runs lazily alongside the town. There, we found boats:
And also this charming old lady, who introduced us to these wonderful Burmese cigars, rolled in leaves with cardboard filters:
For lunch, we were regulars at the Moon Caf茅, just east of Old Bagan. It鈥檚 popular with tourists鈥揳lways a sign to be wary of鈥揵ut it didn鈥檛 disappoint on the food front.
I鈥檝e never eaten so much okra in my life as I did in Burma.
And also a lot of great curries that walk an interesting line between Thai- and Indian-style. Like this pumpkin curry...
I would have happily stayed another week in Bagan. But unless you鈥檙e on one of those endless Southeast Asian vacations to "find yourself" and have loads of time, two or three full days should suffice.
Inle Lake
After the frantic pace of trying to see everything in Bagan鈥攁n impossible undertaking鈥攖he slower pace of Inle Lake is a welcome departure. It鈥檚 accessed via this state-of-the-art airport:
The Heho airport is about an hour outside of Inle Lake, in Shan State, which gives visitors a unique opportunity to observe the challenges of driving in Burma. Perhaps the most baffling and immediately evident quirk is the British legacy of right-hand-drive cars.
This would be no more odd than, say, an American visiting Thailand were it not for the fact that in 1970 the Burmese government mandated that all traffic switch to driving on the right side of the road. Normally, this shift would be accompanied by a transition to left-hand-drive cars鈥攕o that drivers can safely perform such advanced maneuvers as turning left, or safely navigating the curvy mountain roads on the way to Inle Lake. Not so in Burma. Though there are occasional outliers with left-hand-drive, a confounding majority of vehicles, even new ones, retain their British heritage and have the steering wheel and driver on the wrong side of the vehicle for driving on the right side of the road.
Honestly, it鈥檚 nuts.
But we survived our harrowing drive past landscapes like this:
The village of Nyaung Shwe has a nice grit to it, almost like a place you could get stabbed in. There鈥檚 a thriving market with terrifying nuclear drinks:
...And bright green candy that looks amazing but tastes like ass:
But grittiness aside, it鈥檚 a really nice village.
The real highlights of Inle Lake are the food, the surrounding countryside, and the lake. The food is a really interesting blend of Chinese and Southeast Asian cuisine, and is not to be missed. This butterfish steamed in leaves is delicious:
As is this take on chicken satay, served alongside a smooth peanut sauce with a spicy kick:
But you gotta get out on a boat.
For USD 20 (about 120rmb) or so, you can get a four or five-seat longboat with a deafening outboard motor to take you around the lake. Our pilot was a real trooper and didn鈥檛 blink an eye when we asked to go out in the face of an impending storm.
The river that feeds Inle Lake is busy, split between tourists and locals ferrying people, food, and goods down the river.
Thirty minutes or so from Nyaung Shwe, you arrive at this temple:
Which was, to put it mildly, a bit of a disappointment after the temples of Bagan. Spoiler alert: the Inle Lake temple is a gift shop with a gold roof. Avoid.
Make sure you take a whole day on the lake. It's absolutely gorgeous, all swaying reeds, serene mountainsides, and little waterways with access to communities built entirely on stilts.
The countryside surrounding the lake is graceful and worth a bike trip. A short bike ride in any direction will put you in the middle of something like this
Inle Lake was super relaxing, beautiful, and worth a visit.
So Burma, eh?
Yes, Burma. It isn鈥檛 the wild destination it once was. Everyone and their parents will be there soon. It鈥檚 getting popular, so go now.
Places like Yangon and Inle Lake stand to improve with the changes, as more affordable high-quality lodging and services populate the mid-range tourism sector. This is no doubt welcome.
But Bagan, man, Bagan. That place is basically under hospice care already. Wait much longer, and it鈥檒l be strangled dead at the hands of preservation efforts and all the associated evils of mass-market destinations that keep me home most holidays. I鈥檒l never forget barreling down Bagan鈥檚 empty ox paths on a cheap electric scooter, my legs wide and my Burmese skirt billowing in the wind, an endless parade of temples ahead, without a care in the world.
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